Juggling.

I finished my degree as a grown up. Not long after Thing 1 was born, I had to write a paper that required an interview with an HR professional. One of the questions I stuck in there was one I was desperately trying to figure out, "as a working mom, how do you balance it?". I will never forget her answer. She told me that you just have to know your priorities. She said, "I always have several balls in the air and I know I'm going to drop at least one. I just have to be sure it's the right one." Permission to not be perfect.

Permission to drop the ball. All the time. Awesome.

I have sense envisioned myself as a juggler. Kids, husband, work, dogs, work-outs, volunteering, housework and blog...in my mind's eye they are each faces on bowling pins I am tossing through the air. I remember the first time Mr. 1inamillion was hospitalized with an infection during chemo. My imagination placed me on a football field, throwing Things 1 and 2 to my sister, work to my favorite teammate, dropping a few other balls and sprinting down field with a football that was my husband.

As life has continued, I've dropped a lot with no intention of picking it back up and with little regret. PTO? Nope. Classroom volunteer? Huh-uh. Scouts? Not this year, but I'll happily guilt another mom into it for you if I must. Clean house? Bahaha. I began to feel as though I'd progressed to juggling on a tight rope. Maybe a little too cocky about my mad juggling skills, I still tend to take on too much. Let me tell you, in January the balls that couldn't be dropped got heavier, the noise I could typically tune out got too loud and I lost my balance. I didn't just drop a ball or two that could safely bounce. I fell flat down on my rapidly expanding fanny, and was buried below all of it.

That's where I've been, in case you were wondering about my absense here. Flat on my ever-expanding fanny, buried in my basement. I have been digging my out and am beginning to see daylight. I am regaining my balance and focus, slowly adding to what I juggle. Today I picked up the blog and am putting Mrs. 1inamillion back on the list.